| Hey remember when... |
[Feb. 24th, 2008|03:12 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  discontent | ] |
I just realized that Jeffery Brown won an Ignatz. And that I can not view his video for Death Cab for Cutie anywhere on the internet, any insight Beth the all knowing Death Cab fan? |
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| Fish scale face. |
[Mar. 7th, 2007|02:44 pm] |
Nevada was dry. Surprise!
The first day I was there my face started peeling like the body of a fish. I gave in and just slathered my face with a mix of vaseline (a surprisingly effective undereye moisturizer) and various samples of hand lotion.
We went on a moonlit hike with four strangers, it was a really strange dynamic. We met Terry, a very chatty older gentlemen who turned out to be a volunteer for the park and it's historic buildings. Gabe, an english woman who lent us gloves and a headlamp who was wildflowering during the day. And two other women, a teenager and her guardian. The teenager had just moved to Las Vegas from Queens, I told her I thought that was cool, because LLCoolJ was from there.
Turns out she had met him a few times, and madonna too. She wanted to be a dancer.
Our ranger was from Syracuse, NY and he and Matt talked college basketball vs NBA when we got to the trails end until the guardian politely asked them to shut up so we could listen to the silence.
You got it, Listen to the silence. It was awkward and I caught myself holding my breath while the air was heavy with her listening.
We won fourty dollars from the penny slots, so we made way more money than we gambled.
We visited the Shark Reef at the Bellagio, well worth the 12 dollars. I got to pet FUCKING PET!!! some stingrays. And Matt and I sat face to face with a huge sea turtle.
Tommy (Matt's bro) took us to the Amazing Jonathan Show. Aside from the violence towards women and homophobia it was funny. They trained a bunny to come out of this suitcase and climb up this little stair set to a mic and then back down. It made my night.
It seemed like everyone there was from MI. We met a woman working at Target from Battle Creek, a guy at the gun shop from Troy, and the man at the pin ball museum (fixing a Kiss table!) was from Kalamazoo. They all wanted us to move there. I think it is because they were lonely. There doesn't seem to be a sense of community because of the focus of the town. Maybe I'm wrong.
Tommy took us to a gun shop where for ten dollars or so you can shoot a round of any gun. That place was hellah creepy. I did not shoot, and we got there too late to see tommy in action, he wanted to use a machine gun. However, they were selling these posters for target practice that featured images of osama facing you with a machine gun, two jihadists with rocket launchers, and an old man trying to capture some girl. It was so Amurican it hurt. I bought two for my brother.
Vacation: Success. |
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| Oh. |
[Mar. 3rd, 2007|10:02 am] |
We went to the Cirque de Sole show "O" last night. I was impressed, but very sleepy, seeing as the show started at 1.30 MI time. The stage raised and lowered so the majority of time the trapeze artists were diving from the ceiling into water. I liked the lady who hung from the toes of one foot, and the random guy that ran around on the stage cracking a huge bull whip. There wasn't a coherent storline, except for the audience member, who was actually a member of the cast, constantly reappearing and chasing what I assumed was the same girl. The music was all in a made up language, it sounded like me when I just get out of work and scream and sing to myself on the drive home.
I saw: A man who stayed lit on fire for many minutes, bendy people like woah, people diving from the ceiling into the stage pool, clowns that spoke in guttural noises and made penis jokes, and lots of girls in too small dresses wandering around the casino. Boobies everywhere.
I enjoyed it, but the rest of the crowd did not, on the way out I heard numerous jokes about how "those were expensive seats to take a nap in" and everyone was very subdued and nobody was smiling or laughing, not even the drunks.
We went to Costco, which was interesting, because all of the strip malls are surrounded by a backdrop of luscious red mountains and clear blue sky. Everytime we go into a store, or a resturaunt, and then we step out I am amazed by the moutains. I don't know why I forget about them the second I step inside.
We went to the UNLV campus and saw an Oldenburg statue of a giant flashlight, they have really beautiful architecture there, and these birds that make these incrediblely loud noises. We took a short cut through a construction zone, but there weren't any signs posted to not do so, then we were chastized for our trespassing. What were they going to do, suspend us?
It's spring here, there are tress that are blooming bright purple flowers, and the shrubs have flowers too. We saw our first giant plastic tree/cell phone tower. It was out by itself, a green telephone with a pine tree top, and these green panels sticking out the side. I laughed a lot.
There are a lot of spanish music stations, Matt gets a little irritated when I spend our car ride listening to it and translating what I can for him. This is what it sounds like:
"Heart...to leave...uhhh I don't know, me...live, or life, truth...suffering..." I like to think it helps him to appreciate it.
We drove through the strip on our way to the O theater at the Bellagio and we saw some of the fountains dancing. People stopped their cars in the street and threw on thier emergency flashers to watch. What is this, the campus of U of M?
Today we go the Valley of Fire, which sounds intimidating, but it hasn't hit 60 yet. You can tell we are tourists because matt insists on wearing shorts and I wear flip flops, everyone else has those fancy wrap scarves, like rachel got on friends, and knit hats. Wussies.
Did you know you can buy your coffin at Costco?
Nothing like a wholesale coffin to insure entry into heaven. |
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| Assasination Vacation. |
[Mar. 2nd, 2007|06:55 pm] |
Dear Livejournal,
I am in Las Vegas. I was worried that I wouldn't like it because it is an expensive, souless town. However, we spent the first day hiking in Spring Mountain state park. The trail was small, and littered with what I thought was horse poop. Matt argued that the horses wouldn't be able to fit on such a small trail. Turns out he was right, the state park is also a burro conservation area. We were wandering towards the mountains on what seemed like it might be a trail when we heard some rustling to our left, and we found ourselves about fity yards from two lovely brown burros.
Then we toured the ranch on the property. It was previously owned by Vera Krupp, of the famed Krupp diamond. She had a secret room built that you could only access through a closet. My favorite part was the wall paper, it was the original, and it was velvety on the details.
Tonight we are going to see O. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 2nd, 2007|11:43 pm] |
Today Beth and I drew on snowman-shaped off brand peeps. We also pondered our respective life plans.
I posted the pictures of the peeps on myspace. They are blurry, I apologize, although there is one of Beth eating the one with saggy boobs and fangs that is rather sexy.
Matt and I had a Lost-a-thon on New Years Eve, now we are both afraid of the dark, and my apartment.
I may or may not have slept with my pepper spray and a new razor thing my mom bought me for Christmas, at least hypothetically until Matt arrived.
Now I have Ninja Ugly Dolls to protect me.
Christmas was nice, although short, thanks to work.
I did not get to watch my relatives drink wine in a hotel room, as I had to work on the weekend they all got together.
Matt bought me a sweater with Marooska prints of sailboats, and his parents bought me a lot of clothes that are PETITE SMALL. I am not a petite woman, nor am I a small woman.
However, I did get to catch up on some long-lost sleep, and make cookies with Jenny.
I also dyed my hair as close to my natural color as possible. The end result? Nobody noticed the smooth transition from red with gray roots to all over "mink."
Remember when Keith and Betsy wed? That was pretty rad. The best collection of dancing relatives I have ever seen, they actually had one of those circles going where someone steps in and does a dance move then steps back for someone else, etc. It made me smile until my face hurt. And you know, they love each other and all. That's good too!
Plans for this weekend involve a Beth-tastic trip to IKEA and some outlet malls on the other side of the state. And maybe some CHOXIE! (That is chocolate with MOXIE, in case you didn't know-Beth's favorite candy and theme song)
The best gift ever this year? "TEEN WITCH" on DVD. I'm having a sleepover on Saturday night to watch it and many other 80's themed teen movies, you are, of course, invited.
Beth submitted "Can't Hardly Wait" as an option. Although it is not from the 80's I'll let it slide because it features Ethan Embry. (It's complicated, I know he is married, and has a child, and I know it's an winter-spring thing, but love knows no boundaries)
Also, tell George I'm out to get him. In an email sort of way. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 5th, 2006|10:36 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | WCKS, bitch. | ] |
Today was going to be a great day.
The hands of fate decreed that I would be awarded with two consecutive days off.
That meant I could go see Matt in Detroit!
I had to delay my departure time to this morning because of the weather.
So there I am, happily driving along 96, minding my own business when the semi I am passing sheds all of the ice that coated the top of the trailer.
Onto my windshield.
Me: "FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
(covering eyes and shutting them for good measure)
FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!!"
(open eyes -rememebered that I was driving-)
"FUCK!"
So the passenger side was a mess of cracks, shards and glass dust.
After crying in the gas station subway at Lowell, I found an estimate and drove slowly back to GR.
Where I will reside, unable to visit Matt.
Speaking of crying, remember when there was that awesome anonymous post on GV's community about how WCKS "sucks royal balls," it was so pro-active!
I don't usually get into LJ drama, but let me give you the highlights.
Something about how it isn't fair that the leadership gets to pick the next leaders.
(Clearly this person has never tried to host a mandatory all station meeting, or tried to give a college student responsiblity.)
Something about how we should play more Justin Timberlake to reach a wider audience.
(You know, change the format to gain listeners, instead of introducing students to original and beautiful new talent.)
And then something about wanting WCKS to lay down on the carpet so they could piss all over it.
Did I mention that was anonymous?
Because I really think they may be onto something, these all sound like fantastic insights, I bet you they are great friends with that llama-whatever person.
Thanks for all that, really, McPissyAnonymous. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 23rd, 2006|10:28 pm] |
I had such a nice Thanksgiving, Pie, Will Ferrel, Sleeping in, Not Selling Memberships, Family, Cats that tried to eat my hand.
So then I come ho-humming up the stairs to unpack and get ready for working on black friday only to find two re-directed terrible banged up notices from Rent-A-Car.
Let me walk you through my though process.
Rent-A-Car?
That's Odd.
I've never rented a car.
Except for the trip to NYC with WCKS.
When we were hit by a car* and got that weird parking ticket and blew my Dad's credit card trying to find a hotel room without any help from the University.
That was a horrible time for the most part.
Wait, was that through rent-a-car?
So I open the notices, that were sent last January to my campus address from three years ago(WTF?) to find that they have indeed tracked down the person who signed for the rental van as the sole responsible individual for whatever the hell happens to a van driven by a handful of college kids in NYC.
So now, I have to pay this fucking ticket becuase they have already sent my shit to a collection agency because I had fifteen days to reply to the notice in JANUARY!!!
What will I spend my weekend doing?
Trying to contact the people that shared the van with me to see if they will help me pay for it.
It's only like Fifty-odd dollars, but I'm going to have to pay some fucking fees for the collection agency, so you can bet I'm going to try and get my associates in crime to at least pay for the ticket.
Keith goes scotch free because he has a wedding to pay for.
Happy Thanksgiving. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 5th, 2006|10:39 pm] |
I ate some pasta stuffed with cheese that was sitting out on our counter, becuase the S.A.S kids were meeting in the other room. They didn't know that I was freeloading (unless they heard the telltale microwave beep.) Then I drank some of the koolade that I made last night, somehow the two flavors, combined with the previous flavor of free pizza from my work meeting, makes me mouth taste exactly like throw-up. Nothing against the food, but I think it was just a bad combo on my part.
Also, I have been trying really hard to mentally pysch myself up to start writing again, so I keep trying to think of something to write about to submit to our writing group.
Things that I have come up with:
-How my work shoes don't fit, and are uncomfortable but I wear them day after day, forgetting about the problems as soon as I take them off.
-How my feet smell from my work shoes that don't fit and are uncomfortable.
-The fact that my pants are too short, but I insist on wearing them because I can't afford to buy a new pair, so I just sag them and wear long tank tops under my shirts so you can't tell.
-How I run so late in the morning that I don't have time to shower, so I pretend my hair looks like this on purpose.
Then I realized that all I can seem to think to write about is how poorly I look after my personal appearence, and how that relates to work. So I don't write at all.
Also I thought I was pregnant last week, because my belly suddenly (in a period of two days) swelled to an gigantic and painful size (I couldn't button my pants over it...more sagging pants). It turns out I was just pregnant with candy bar induced poop. I gave birth to the ugliest babies ever.
See!!!How fucking poetic is that? Find me someone who will pay me for my words!!! |
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| Remeber when? |
[Oct. 30th, 2006|11:23 pm] |
Remember when...
I found this great internship where they could teach me how to produce and I would even be able to write for the show and help with live remotes?
And it was 5am-10am. And I was like, yes, I can work from 5am-6.15 every weekday!
And then I learned that Barnes and Noble opens at 6am for holiday shopping season.
And I realized that my life was over.
That was today!
Remember when...
Beth rubbed her boobies on me. I wore green grease paint that burned when I sweated. I danced for four hours straight? When I managed a halloween costume that incorporated both my oldies hat and hot pink elbow length gloves? I finally got to see my boyfriend?
That was this weekend!
Remember when...
I hadn't written anything since graduating? I agreed to run a 5k on Thanksgiving, the prize of which is a turkey? I get Friday off?
That is right now!
Also, who will clean my room and organize my closet and dresser? I'll give you some fun size kit-kats!
Hooray for handing candy out to trick or treaters tomorrow!
Stop by, I'll totally throw handfulls of candy at your face
Isn't that how everyone does it?
Happy Motherfucking Halloween.
Oh, also did I list my halloween costume ideas that never came to fruitation?
Bunnicula, 80's aerobic instructor, sexy mummy, unicorn, record, your mom, Calvin of Calvin and Hobbes (no electrical tape or stuffed tiger...although I tried to convince alex that he could be my tiger.) |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 14th, 2006|12:13 pm] |
Remember how I went to the Sharon Olds reading, and it was a lot of fun. Except for, you know, seeing people that I hate. But the good news is that over time I seem to have developed the ability to throw a pixilated mask (like on cops) over people I don't want to acknowledge. I'm getting really good at it, these pixalted faced people kept floating around my peripherary, but had no effect. You should try it.
I also find that humming the "Bad Boys" theme song helps to enforce the pixalated placement.
So I ate some cheese that night. Lot's of it. And the day before that I had started to feel really weird. The description I settled on for my tummy ache for that last few days is "my stomach has turned to brick making in it's down time, and I have a full size one jammed in my torso."
I went to the Art Walk on division, and saw some really beautfiul things and danced to a wonderful band that performed in a room surrounded by paintings of mexican masked wrestlers. The dancing with my sexy face on must have worked to churn this brick into PURE LIQUID! I was up until 5 this morning pooing gushing water. And to top it all off, we have bees that have somehow taken up residency in our bathroom, and I didn't realize until it flew off of my that a bee had been kicking it on my hand for my 2.30 am bathroom run. I have since killed a second bee at my 5am run. That is probably the sixth this week.
I want to finally start writing some stuff to record at WGVU. I was offered an internship, but it was sort of rescinded (sp?) after I told him I would have a full time job, he told me to come back in the fall. Well, it's fall, and I should probably get my shit together.
I think my first piece will be about how I tried to resolve my feelings of being a complete failure by buying a hedgehog as a pet, but the only one I found was completely unsocialized and just shook and growled at me when I looked at him. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 11th, 2006|03:15 pm] |
I just realized that I can't add photos, becuase I have a free account.
I was going to share all the things that I have been doing instead of looking for a career related job.
They include:
Seeing tall ships.
Sitting on cement animal replicas of trademarked disney characters. (These were of course, illegal copies, and not very well done.)
Camping.
Color-touring, which includes a pumpkin catipult, a box of free kittens, cider, donuts, climbing hay piles and getting lost in knee high corn mazes.
Visiting Jenny.
Going to Ikea.
Taking sexy pictures of Beth Spencer with a flower.
Repeatedly cleaning my room.
Sleeping.
Dinosaur Gardens.
Panic!At the Disco.
Knitting.
And All of this was going to be shown to you with my lovely picture taking abilities.
I put a few up on facebook, so there. |
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| You are Invited! |
[Aug. 22nd, 2006|10:06 pm] |
You are Invited to:
The "Ha You Have to Go Back to School Tomorrow and I Don't, I Can't Quit My Job, Happy Beleated Birthday Kathryn, Happy Birthday MacKenzie" Wet Hot American Summer themed potluck.
So to break it down. Bring food to share. Come dressed as your favorite Wet Hot American Summer character, or in the time period therein.
It will start at 4. Around 9 if people are interested, we can move it on over to 80's night in costume. Badmitten and volleyball sets are needed, as well as any other fun outdoor games. (We are taking over the back yard, so tell that skunk to watch out!)
Need to know where we live? Post here to ask for address or phone number. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 18th, 2006|12:00 am] |
Today someone stole my bike from my backyard.
Apparently I forgot to close the gate/it's broken so it never stays shut anyways, and the shiny blue of my fancy bike (that I just dropped 100$ on at the begining of the summer to have tuned up) was too tempting to pass up.
Regardless of the fact that my birthday weekend plans consisted of biking the Kal Haven Trail until South Haven then frolicking in the waves.
Don't worry, my Mom promised me the use of her bike.
And I get to have my Grandmothers bike that is stuck in 3rd gear, so I can work off that extra loving I get from eating mall food.
Also, I tried to install a shelf I bought at IKEA a month or so ago, it took forever, and required a lot of trips to various stores.
Apparently my walls consist of patches of
a. frightenly(sp) thin drywall(?) that the screws just sink into
b. metal
So, one side is secured, the other sort of hangs off.
But I think Beth was aroused by the fact that I know how to handle a drill, and damn well if I may say so.
This just in! It's embarrasing when people you once worked with at the Writing Center come up to you while you are working at the bookstore and congratulate you on Graduation then ask..."So what are you doing" and all you have to point to is the register in front of you and your lanyard. Meanwhile, they are school teachers or medical somethings or you know, not in retail.
But I have a job, right? And I can eat! Right!
So Cheers all around and some naps! |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 13th, 2006|11:23 pm] |
This just in:
People get enraged about weird things in a book store.And make no sense.
Customer: I see you have "Catch 22" out on the beach reading table.
Me: Ha, yeah, isn't that funny? It's not exactly beach reading.
C: Yeah, you guys are going to create the next generation of trenchcoat wearers.
M:(silently freaking out that this person makes this connection and believes it)
...Ahhh, yeah I guess it's better than those romance novels, more interesting...
C: Yeah...interesting...that's a word...
M:....
I rang him up for his purchase of Chuck Palanaachuaks "Survivor."
You know, the one with the death scene on the giant hill of porn and the bashing in of skulls and the suicide cults.
See...see? |
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| Angsty McAngst Alot. |
[Aug. 7th, 2006|08:56 pm] |
So I know I'm only 21, soon to be 22 (very soon!).
But this is my summer of quarter life crisis.
I may or may not:
Hate my job
Cry a lot because of said job
Want to sleep all of the time
Be under immense amount of pressure from BF and parents to keep job.
Watch Beth Spencer sleep at night.
I did:
Visit Dinosaur Garden
Traverse City
Drive when I was far to tired to be driving through a horrible rain storm
Watch 7th Heaven
Learn and Love Katamari
Gain a new cavity
Crack open an old cavity cap with a jumbo box of jawbreakers. (I'm a nervouse cracker and chewer of objects...namely small round or square things).
Highlights of my life recently:
My Mom asking what "camel toe" is (quite insistently and loudly) in front of long lost cousins and a best friend and Kerry (my brothers gf).
My Uncle Ron taking his shirt off within 20 minutes of Matt and I arriving at the house for my mothers birthday party. It stayed off the rest of the night. He is a large, hairy man that likes to hunt and randomly distribute great yet intense philosphical advice.
Potentially owning a silkscreened portrait of Kerry's cat...yogi.
I have decided:
To talk to my boss/try and quit.
That all some people suck, I knew it in the first place, but just forgot about it.
I forge bad things that people do to me really easily.
That I should never post in LJ again for the benefit of all mankind. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 24th, 2006|10:50 pm] |
Remeber when I saw an abandon shack in the woods on my way to secluded beach with Matt on our minivacation, and how it had piles of porn stacked by the side door, and then I wrote to Ander Monson to tell him how it made me think of him and "Other Electricities" and then I hoped he wouldn't sue me or file for a restraining order?
Yeah, that was funny. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 24th, 2006|07:34 pm] |
Things I need to remember to post about:
Alpena and cement.
Children burning themselves with flameballs.
My failure as a Professional Rescuer.
Paul Bunyan and Babe the Blue Cow.
Lake Huron. |
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| Check your pants. |
[Jul. 17th, 2006|07:35 pm] |
Today was the first day of training at work. It was a lot to take in, luckily I got to take the readings home and I get to study them for tomorrow.
Everyone I met seemed very nice, and I look forward to working with them, even though my stomach is in knots thinking about having to make all those rookie mistakes on the register and dealing with customers again.
I learned that West Michigan is a conservative area (!) and that there will be many customers, many times, that will come in and take their godly rage out on me becuase they do not like the material sold in the store. And as head cashier it is my job to take it! Not personally of course.
Is it horrible that all it made me think was "finally I'll have something to write about"?
Also, I kept setting off the security alarm in the music area, and when I left for the day.
Apparently I have to go through and check mypants for hidden security tags.
When I left I just shouted to the concerned looking cashiers "It's cool, it's just my pants."
The customers looked confused, and surprised that they let me leave.
I was supposed to be paid for my freelancing last week.
Then they told me it would be this week.
Then they told me it would take two weeks more to be processed by payroll.
It's okay, it's not like I was told this was a 4-5 week project at the end of May.
Katherine and I have spent all afternoon playing Katamari.
I am angry because I can't get past level 4 star.
I'm going to go check my pants, you should too. |
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| I'm exactly where you'd like me to be... |
[Jul. 14th, 2006|12:06 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | angst (dedicated to Beth) | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Panic! At the Disco | ] |
Yes Beth Spencer and I did dance to Panic!At the Disco along with twelve billion other screaming thirteen year olds.(Although to be fair I did see this guy from GV there with his girlfriend, and a lot of moms and one 40 year old groupie that looked suspiciously like a hooker...)
And I loved it.
Though they had their own dancers, and I don't know what to do with that quite yet.
I suddenly find myself aroused by 19 year old boys-with waistlines the size of my thigh-in suspenders.
It wasn't until they played their cover of "Tonight, Tonight" that I realized they ripped their whole concert scheme off of the Smashing Pumpkins.
I laughed because half of the audience was too young to know the lyrics or the importance of the Smashing Pumpkins. Then felt sad and a little old.
They took my key clip (caribeeaner?)! Security took them all from everyone at the door.
Those bitches. Now how will I stop myself from leaving my keys in my car and locking them in all the time?
Dresden Dolls were a great surprise. They did a cover of Black Sabbath, I don't know the song, but it was about war and Satan Spreading his wings. I was impressed.
Today I get to eat lunch with my Dad, and met a guy named Theo when I was recovering from my run (walking back because it was too damn hot to be running).
He took the bus here from Detroit and is trying to find a BoRicks so he can work here, becuase he wants to live here. But how can he work here if he doesn't live here?
All I know is that it was too hot to be walking around, he was waiting until it hit 90 so he could ride the bus for free. |
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| 4 Runners. |
[Jul. 13th, 2006|03:43 pm] |
I recieved an offer from River City Books today. And just realized that in the email I had to send telling the owner I couldn't work for them, even though I would fucking love to, I called it "River Bank Books."
It pays less than Barnes and Nobles, but works around my schedule so I could see Matt on weekends, and do my internship at WGVU.
It does not have health insurance.
Barnes and Nobles pays more. It is the Walmart of bookstores.
I might not be happy with it.
I do not get to see Matt on weekends, except for once a month.
It does have health insurance.
I don't want to grow up I'm a toys r us kid. There are a million things that I can...
Pee Wees playhouse is on Adult Swim, it's a trip, I got so excited to see all the little parts that I forgot about, like Penny and the Dinosaurs. So I it is possible that I may not like my job but...
I can stare at Beth Spencer while she works.
I will be able to breath. (In 60 days)
And that my friends, is priceless.
Also, I did some secret shopping and test drove 4 Runner today. I wanted to giggle the whole way I sat so high up. |
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